khelona. johnny johnny joker. mastana. johnny johnny joker.

Holla back if ya'll remember this Shwetha Shetty blahstu from the pahstu! Also holla back if you remember the days when Suchitra Krishnamoorthi was known for this song! Holla back for Sharon Prabhakar! Parvati Khan! Rock Machine! Holla back if you read the word 'holla' and think it is a Punjabi word! Holla back for all the peeps who refer to bhangra as Sikh dancing!

And now, All The Indians Of The Indias, Please Aware!


The proprietor of Sona-Chandi-Plutonium Chywanprash, Paras Sharma himselfs brings us glad tidings of Madness Mandali. What it is? What do they want? Will they take our kidneys? All those questionanswers are addressed in this mysterious mailer which has been copypasted and given down in the below. I think this must have come from terrorists because it has terrorist writing in it.

What is this Madness मंडळी?
Madness मंडळी is a maha mash-up of creative minds each of whom express themselves uniquely. But when their powers combine - the results are bound to be crazy!

Okay so do you guys have any ideas?
Of course we do! In fact we're currently compiling a book of art and poetry, visual poetry if you may

Visual Poetry means?
Means ke, first we compile a bunch of poems from poets then our artists read them and come up with illustrations that visually represent the poems. Nice no?

Nice, but what will you do with all these entries?
We'll compile them and publish a book of course!

Really?
Mother Promise!

How?
Two words...Self - Publishing. And three more...Print on Demand! It's so eco-friendly, Captain Planet cried!

Will Madness मंडळी own my work if it gets featured?
Rubbish, you still own the copyrights...we'll steal your kidney though...Kidding...Not!

Sweet, how do I participate?
If you are a poet - send in your 3 best poems. If you are an artist - show us an example of your art work. Mail us your entries at madnessmandali@gmail.com. Last Date for entries is August 20th, 2010.

Having further questionanswer means please head over to their FB page. Also, how awesome is the little dude in the logo! He's like that little plankton dude from Spongebob only much more zen and musical and mustachioed. It is also important to note that while the plankton dude is completely nekkid, the Madness Mandali fellow is having a lion cloth, in keeping with Indian traditions and cultures.

And now, eating a fetus. This is one of those things that ideally, you should never do in your life, particularly if it's a human fetus. In fact, one must try and be as aggressive as possible about not eating fetuses. But sometimes you think to yourself, eating a human fetus sounds like a really good idea right now. Here are a couple of things that recently made me feel like eating a human fetus.

1. Illustrious folk who would like you to explain the Indian caste system to them in 30 words or less. Seriously. And when you can't, they don't understand WHY you can't because they honestly believe that casteism is just racism only it's spelled differently and it involves Indians. I honestly believe that unicorns shit rainbows but whatever. It's a truly studlywudly thing to reduce all forms of discrimination to some form of EuroCentricAmericanCentric racism. It's kind of like how all food on this planet is essentially a sandwich. Really it is. It's a fetus sandwich!



2. The faction on the left that accuses you of being 'Americanized' and the faction on the right that accuses you of being 'Exoticized'. That makes me want to eat two fetuses.

3. People who hate Bollywood because it's not Hollywood. Which bears a striking resemblance to those folks who hate writing in regional languages because it's not English writing and those who hate regional music because it's not English music. That's a hard situation to be in, especially when you live in India. So all I have to say is have a fetus, you'll feel better. And don't worry, it's not an Indian fetus, it's an English one. Also,




And now, PUPPEH PICTURE! The puppeh in question is Mia. And this is what happened when she got a copy of my buk.



Mia is neither smiling nor holding the book effectively. In fact, the book seems to have made her depressed. Was it the profusion of vomiting in teh fictionz? The fully fuckfuck languages? The rather high 'wtf' factor of so many of the stories? Or was it because she is a puppeh and maybe not that into reading? We will never really know because like a lot of difficult foreign people, Mia does not speak English. However, I am pleased to note that later on, Mia was able to appreciate the book a lot more when she started eating it. Maybe you should try this too. Buy the book. And if you don't like reading it, you can eat it.

okbai.